“She wakes up each morning feeling like she has nothing to do. No routine. No purpose.”
Lisa Genova: ‘Love Anthony’
I read these words this morning and thought, that is exactly ME. That is me when I wake without that feeling of excitement about hurrying to a sewing, writing or art project, or without an appointment, or wanting to return to a novel that is drawing me with the power of the tide.
I do enjoy sitting, apparently doing nothing, but my mind has to be engaged in creative thought for me to relax.
I keep a pile of six to eight library books on hand to alleviate the desolate feeling of nothing-to-do. Mind you, there is always housework or organizing a closet or room, but at this stage of my life – been there, done that.
Our journey thro this life is tumultuous with its constant ups and downs, its real or imagined slights. We all barter, in one way or another, to maintain a relatively consistent feeling of well being.
I thrive on passion – for opportunity, creativity, my family.
The alternative to feeling purposeful is, for me, depression. So, in order to ward off that monster, I always have a multitude of projects on the go.
Early in my marriage, it was one project only – needlework. Then I needed a new interest and, for a few decades, it was researching and publishing our genealogy. With that completed, I felt lost, until my creative juices latched onto sketching with pen and painting in watercolour. Florals are my thing.
Gradually, after several years, I began to feel I had said all I could in that media. My search was on for new artistic horizons.
I don’t know if it is because I am now in my early 70’s, but I now seem to flit from one project to another. Whatever it is, I am artistically all over the place – a true jack of all trades, master of none.
But there is nothing as satisfying and addictive as waking to a passionate urge to create.
That is what keeps my juices flowing and keeps me loving my life.
It has been awhile since I logged in to my Inknpetals blog and began to write. In part, this is because of a busy summer, now a thing of the past, but also because I have been mentally floating between many projects and thoughts of projects. But my friend Gerda’s call, the day before yesterday, inspired me to put fingers to keyboard today. She phoned to ask if all was well with me – she was concerned because of my lack of online activity lately.
I go in cycles, concentrating on one activity for awhile. Other times I have too many things on the go at once. When that happens, I shut down, curl up and read 8 mystery, detective, forensic novels in two weeks. (Yup – happened end of August!)
I have a new grand child about to be born in less than a month, so many thoughts revolve around the anticipation of this delicious event – our first babe in the family in more than 11 years … and Greg and my 10th grandchild.
I am working on her ancestral lineage – her family tree …
– shopping for wee items to be opened at upcoming showers …
. fingering through memory-laden baby clothes from 38 to 45 years ago, that were worn by my babies, and some were knitted by my own Mom . purchasing delicate, baby-friendly Ivory Snow to wash some of the treasures . . finding a friend who actually still irons so an exquisite dress of the finest ’embroidered lawn’ will brought back to its glorious potential.
Most responses to my query about who loves to iron, brought guffaws that could be loudly heard on the written, virtual page. I haven’t owned an iron for 20 years.
Sally has come through. I am dropping by next week, coffee in hand and ready for a chat while she irons the dainties.
I have been yearning to knit a blanket for my newest grandchild. That entailed searching for my needles to see if I already have what I need. That quest, in turn, led to multiple bags of partially finished projects, wool bundles, patterns, knitting & crochet books …..
So what to do? I start a KNITTING & CROCHET group – you know – like-minded women who can support each other with glitches, laugh and have fun together. We had our first get-together yesterday. Sue, Wendy and Marion were unanimous in agreeing that I had to complete one or more projects before beginning another. So baby will have to wait for the trendy, chunky wool cover I envision creating in the softest grey, using ginormous needles.
In her blog, “More Quilt & Novel Nonsense”, Anna Scott Graham wrote: “In this rather techie world, aged pastimes are slipping from our consciousness. It’s easier to virtually do so much else, but what else is actually being accomplished?”
An idea to chomp on. I love any creative outlet – writing, painting (tho’ I have not been doing much of that of late), genealogy (love the sloothing), journaling, as well as additional sedentary pursuits like music and reading. I love a mixture of new, addictive technology and the tactile feel of bamboo needles and natural cotton, silk and wool skeins. I love walking my puppy, Duffy, on days like today when the roar of the waves from Georgian Bay, three blocks away, instilled their strength in me. I love to walk when my arthritic feet are calm, when the gentle drizzle blows against me and the few fallen leaves remind me that autumn has indeed begun.
So, Gerda, I am well. I am happy. I am accomplishing a bit and enjoying the strains of ‘The (Canadian) Tenors’ as I wrap this up. Enjoy your Spa in Italy, girl. Such a furcken hardship that will be 🙂 ! I wish.
Hugs to any and all who read this … Tell me what you are up to in your life.