I haven’t posted here for months. Writing has been temporarily replaced by my venture into …
abstract art . acrylic pours . fluid art .
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Memoir: “DECADES: Journey Through My 70’s” .
QUOTATIONS that Motivate & Inspire Me
First, before I delve into the subject of quotations, let me say that I am so grateful. I realized this afternoon that I have 905 followers. That is a huge increase from the last time I wrote. I am bamboozled, pleased, and so thankful. To show my appreciation, I will endeavour to write more consistently. Thank you and please drop a line, share your thoughts.
Today would have been my mother’s 99th birthday. She was my biggest fan and my inspiration. I miss you Mom.
Evelyn King Robertson, August 27, 1918 – February 13, 2007.
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QUOTATIONS
That Motivate & Inspire Me
I am a compulsive quote recorder. Words spoken in a documentary, movie, book or anywhere, suddenly stop me in my tracks & a little light flickers in my consciousness & I have to pause and jot them down. Some inspire. Some justify a belief system I have developed over the decades of my life. Some simply make me feel good. Whatever the feeling they evoke, I now record them in my Mac ‘Notes’, but in the previous millennium, I filled notebooks with other peoples’ ruminations.
“Choose to be happy. ” That bit of advice was groundbreaking for me in the 1970’s. The thought that happiness is a choice was mind blowing to me! This altered my way of dealing with the bad bits. Everyone’s life is filled with every possible emotion – with sadness, tragedy, success, failure, but it is how we choose to live our lives, despite any and all of those, that defines us.
I think most everyone wrestles with thoughts on religion, spirituality, the meaning of life. I know I have gone through massive and meaningful changes in my belief systems over the years, resulting in an about turn from the religious teachings of my youth. I have not thrown out the proverbial baby with the bath water, in that I still believe in love, the golden rule and so on, however, my views on many issues, including afterlife, have altered dramatically. (Many of my posts touch on this subject, but specifically see, “An Oak Tree and I”)
Following are some quotes I have recorded. They make me think, make me laugh, inspire, encourage, illuminate:
“Who sets my course,
Determines my values, my right, my wrong,
Gives me strength, or succumbs to weakness,
Judges me,
… the Person in the Mirror”
– unknown
“If we are all alone, we are all together in that too. Realizing that helps me sometimes.”
– Kathy Bates’ character in the movie, ‘P.S. I Love You’
“Don’t Believe everything you think.”
– Jan Arden
“Above all, do not loose your desire to walk. I know of no thought so burdensome that one cannot walk away from it.”
– Kierkegaard
“I have decided on a destination; the path is but a detail. I have begun my walk.”
– Richard Paul Evans, ‘The Walk’ – Alan Christofferson’s Diary
“She’s not really gone. She’s still a part of you. What part of you is your choice. She can be a spring of gratitude and joy, or she can be a fountain of bitterness and pain. It is entirely up to you.”
– Richard Paul Evans, ‘TheWalk’
“Ring the bells that still can ring,
Forget your perfect offering,
There’s a crack in everything,
That’s how the light gets in.”
– Leonard Cohen
“I’m FINE:
Fucked-up,
Insecure,
Neurotic,
Egotistical”
– Louise Penny, ‘Dead Cold’
Buddhist Quotes
“You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger.”
“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.”
ZEN-BUDDHISM – a wee primer ….
. ‘Buddha’ is a title, ‘one who is awake’ — in the sense of having ‘woken up to reality’.
. Buddha has great compassion which is completely impartial, embracing all living beings without discrimination.
. Buddha developed a practice and way of life that he called “The Middle Way,” a path of moderation – away from the extremes in every aspect of life. By “middle”, Buddha essentially meant that we need to embrace both spiritualism as well as materialism, just like the front and back sides of a sheet of paper. . Zen embraces the two opposites and integrates the two to bring about a condition which can help an individual reach the highest dimension, mushotoku.
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REHABILITATION & RECOVERY for My EATING, My FOOD, My HABITS .
“WEIGHT LOSS IS NOT LINEAR!”
Hearing this gave me a whopping-big ‘light bulb moment’.💡💡💡
Breakfast
Lunch . Water, Pork Tenderloin
I am committed to bringing myself back to some semblance of health. This Monday, week #2 of my new life focus, I went for my weigh-in, confident I would be bamboozled with triumph. After all, in week #1, I lost 4 pounds. Since then I have been positive, tracking religiously, keeping my ‘eating and recipe diary’, drinking and outputting water every two hours, and eating only 900-1200 cal per day. All that without feeling hungry or craving.
And, I lost only one miserable pound.
I was emotionally crushed, even tho’ intellectually, I knew I shouldn’t be. But I could not ‘buck up’. Instead, I ate a container of Helluva Dip, dill flavour (yum) with sticks of celery, crawled into bed with my iPad and played Solitaire for nearly two hours.
I realized this is not a ‘diet’ I am on. Rather, it is – what do they say now, “a lifestyle change’. But that lofty term does not accurately portray the concept of weight loss and what the challenge really is.
I mentioned to my husband, Greg, my pitiful but entirely natural bout of depression the previous day.
Greg replied that, since his recent knee replacement, “despite working my butt off, some days I feel like crap – my recovery, like your weight loss, is not linear, even tho’ my exercise regime is”.
That is when lightning struck⚡️! Developing my new food prep, food plan and attitude is neither a lifestyle change nor a diet.
No! What it really is, is ‘Rehabilitation & Recovery’ from my 3 decades of over-eating. And to expect my R&R to go smoothly every day or every week is unrealistic.
OK! That I get! As a registered nurse (retired), I can relate to that. I can finally see my next months for what they really are – REHABILITATION – with ups & downs, success and failure, happy and sad, just like all of life.
I will take this new vision with me to my weekly weigh-ins, hopefully diverting a sulk, despair or depression when the scale is not saying what I hoped for or expected .
Weight loss is not linear! Nor is rehabilitation and recovery, from any illness, trauma, surgery. Nor, indeed, is any of our life-journey linear.
So, I tell myself, “This is my rehabilitation! You go girl! Remember: water, protein, vegetables.”
‘To Go’
🤗 I’ve got this! 👍
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LIFE STAGES . TRUST THE JOURNEY .
TRUST THE JOURNEY
“She wakes up each morning feeling like she has nothing to do. No routine. No purpose.”
Lisa Genova: ‘Love Anthony’
I read these words this morning and thought, that is exactly ME. That is me when I wake without that feeling of excitement about hurrying to a sewing, writing or art project, or without an appointment, or wanting to return to a novel that is drawing me with the power of the tide.
I do enjoy sitting, apparently doing nothing, but my mind has to be engaged in creative thought for me to relax.
I keep a pile of six to eight library books on hand to alleviate the desolate feeling of nothing-to-do. Mind you, there is always housework or organizing a closet or room, but at this stage of my life – been there, done that.
Our journey thro this life is tumultuous with its constant ups and downs, its real or imagined slights. We all barter, in one way or another, to maintain a relatively consistent feeling of well being.
I thrive on passion – for opportunity, creativity, my family.
The alternative to feeling purposeful is, for me, depression. So, in order to ward off that monster, I always have a multitude of projects on the go.
Early in my marriage, it was one project only – needlework. Then I needed a new interest and, for a few decades, it was researching and publishing our genealogy. With that completed, I felt lost, until my creative juices latched onto sketching with pen and painting in watercolour. Florals are my thing.
Gradually, after several years, I began to feel I had said all I could in that media. My search was on for new artistic horizons.
I don’t know if it is because I am now in my early 70’s, but I now seem to flit from one project to another. Whatever it is, I am artistically all over the place – a true jack of all trades, master of none.
But there is nothing as satisfying and addictive as waking to a passionate urge to create.
That is what keeps my juices flowing and keeps me loving my life.
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Creative Juices . quilting . sewing . knitting .
So, I have been sewing a little, and quilting, and knitting (a very little) and most recently have been hooked on practising lettering – modern calligraphy. My creative juices are all over the place at the moment. But I love the excitement of waking with design ideas rolling around in my head. That is what I have been missing for a year or more.
I love waking, making a coffee, and hurrying to create. It is exhilarating.
Sweetie loves her ‘toy sleeping bag’
This is all a huge change from watercolour painting, which I will return to eventually, but fresh creative motivation is what I seem to crave now. I tackled quilting and sewing projects for each of our five children and their families …
above ~ Andrew’s Hudson Bay patterned table runner
above ~ Carrie’s quilted BoHo table runner
above ~ Jo’s quilted table runner
Some of my quilting is a little wonky as I am a novice, but loving it!
Steph’s decorative linen pillow cases
Sew, that is what I have been up to the past months. I am finding that, for me, choosing colour and pattern is the most difficult part of these projects. More about that next time.
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“A Goldsmith of Words” . Quotes of Amadeu de Prado .
Last night I watched the fi1m, “Night Train to Lisbon” with Jeremy Irons, based on the book by Pascal Mercier.
My head is still swirling with the beautiful, important images spun by the words of Portuguese Doctor, Amadeu de Prado. The dictatorship of Salazar impacted his life, thoughts and words from his years as a student to his premature death at the age of 53 years. I was riveted to the screen.
I was not the only one.
E. L. Fay was influenced by the book, ‘Night Train to Lisbon’. Her 2009 blog “This Book and I Could be Friends” sums up my feelings on the topic of Amadeu de Prado.
She writes from the book:
“Was it possible that the best way to make sure of yourself was to know and understand someone else? One whose life had been completely different and had had a completely different logic than your own? How did curiosity for another life go together with the awareness that your own time was running out?”
E.L.Fay describes herself as a “Progressive bibliophile recovering from a sordid conservative past.”
See ‘This Book and I Could Be Friends” at http://www.tselfoninternets.blogspot.ca
The image of the devastatingly handsome de Prado and clips from the movie can be seen in “A Goldsmith of Words” – “Life” at: https://positivited.wordpress.com
Excerpts:
“DE ALMEIDA PRADO, AMADEU INÁCIO (1920-1973).
Featuring in Pascal Mercier‘s philosophical novel Night Train to Lisbon (later adapted into a film starring Jeremy Irons), Amadeu de Prado was born a judge’s son in the Portugal of Salazar. He heavily criticized Salazar’s dictature in his speech given upon graduating as a doctor. His only book was self-published posthumously in 1975, entitled Um ourives des palavras (Portuguese for “A Goldsmith of Words”, a phrase alluding to Friedrich Nietzsche).
‘A Goldsmith of Words’-“Life” in the Words of Amadeu de Prado from Ashok Kumar Taduri on Vimeo.
Night Train to Lisbon, in which the story of Gregorius and quotes from de Prado’s book are woven together, can be considered a literary reflection of Peter Bieri’s philosophical works (the man behind the Mercier pseudonym). The art of life and authenticity are important themes in his works.
Wonderful Quotes of Amadeu de Prado:
“We live here and now, Everything before and in other places is past and mostly forgotten”.
“What could – what should be done, with all the time that lies ahead of us? Open and unshaped, feather light in its freedom and lead-heavy in its uncertainty? Is it a wish, dreamlike and nostalgic, to stand once again at that point in life, and be able to take a completely different direction to the one which has made us who we are?”
“We leave something of ourselves behind, only leave a place, we stay there even though we go away. And there are things in us that we can find again only by going back there. We travel to ourselves when we go to a place though we have covered a stretch of our life, no matter how brief it may have been. But by travelling to ourselves|we must confront our own loneliness. And isn’t it so everything we do is done out of fear of loneliness? Isn’t that why we renounce all the things we will regret at the end of our lives?”
“When dictatorship is a fact, revolution is a duty”.
“Is it ultimately a question of self-image that determining idea one has made for oneselve of what has to be accomplished and experienced so that one can approve the life one has lived? If this is the case, the fear of death might be described as the fear of not been able to become whom one planned to be. If the certainty befalls us that it will never be achieved… this homeness, you suddenly don’t know how to live the time, that can no longer be part of a whole life”.
“The real director of life is accident, a director full of cruelty compassion and bewitching charm.”
“The decisive moments of life, when its direction changes forever, are not always marked by large and shown dramatics. In truth, the dramatic moments of a life determining experience, are often unbelieveable low key. When it unfolds its revolutionary effects and insures that a life is revealed in a brand new light, it does that silently. And in this wonderful silence resides its special nobility.”
“In youth, we live as if we were immortal, Knowledge of mortality dances around us like a brittle paper ribbon that barely touches our skin. When, in life does that change? When does the ribbon tighten, until finally it strangles us?”
Amadeu de Prado died in 1973 of the rupture of an aneurysm in his brain, of which he’d been long aware.”
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MOUNTAIN CLIMBING & TRUFFLE FRIES … B.C. TRAVELS, day 7 . Memoir .
Today is my last day in Golden and the sun is shining gloriously. Early this morning the family headed up the 14 kilometer winding mountain road to the base of Kicking Horse Mountain. From the resort and shops, gondolas take us up another 4300 feet to the top where we are perched at 7700 feet elevation.
Stephanie, Jeff, Brendan and Tyler are eager for their mountain adventure. They are taking part in the Kicking Horse “Via Ferrata” (Italian for ‘iron path’) climbing experience.
After a brief lesson and practice …
They hike to the mountain (off to the right) where they will begin mountain climbing.
While they are busy at that, I head to the restaurant for coffee – I am a little early and they don’t open for lunch for 20 minutes.
I choose a seat with a view of my family on the rock face across from my table.
A ‘close up’ and the mountain climbers are barely discernible. Here is a ‘close-up’ –
While they were busy testing their endurance and conquering their fears, I was enjoying myself –
Then I went outside to enjoy the views
A Windblown Selfie atop the mountain.
Back home, Steph harvests vegetables from her garden
It has been a lovely, fun-filled week with my daughter, Stephanie, her husband Jeff, as well as my two fabulous grandsons, Brendan and Tyler. Thank you for more wonderful life memories and the opportunity to spend time with you.
Love, Mom
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Boo the Grizzly … B.C. TRAVELS, day 6 . Memoir .
The forest-fire smoke has lifted a little, but in its place, dense cloud-cover continues to make every view grey and hazy.
More firsts today as Stephanie treated us to the Grizzly Bear Sanctuary halfway up Kicking Horse Pass mountain. We timed it for the 10 AM tour, recommended online as the best time to see Boo, and so it was. We were in for a treat.
Boo, a 12-year-old grizzly, was orphaned at four months. The day it happened, people stopped roadside to enjoy the sight of a lovely large grizzly bear easily within sight of the road. Sensing danger, the conscientious mother bear, had shooed her three cubs up into a near-by tree for safety. Another man pulled in, pointed his rifle out his open window and shot Boo’s mother, right in front of the cubs and all the other people. He then gunned his truck and drove off. That was how Boo came to be here.
Today, Boo was full of piss and vinegar, ready to perform for us.
Below – 12-year-old and nearly 800 pound Boo taking a break from his grazing to check out his visitors.
After putting on a show for us, Boo decided he wanted to run.
To see the video Stephanie did of this amazing event –
And more of Boo …
- Boo having a sit-down after his run with his favourite Australian tour guide.
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Tyler, Brendan & Steph posing with Boo - Back home, Steph does her magic in the garden and kitchen …
- BBQ’d Prosciutto wrapped chicken breasts, zucchini, asparagus.
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Dinner with Steph & Jeff, Tyler & Brendan -
Dinner – Presentation is everything! -
We miss you Papa. You would have enjoyed today.
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SMOKE 3 … B.C. TRAVELS, days 4 & 5 . Memoir .
Who’da thunk it? The smokey haze continues but we aren’t letting it get in the way of enjoying the end of summer 2015. Well, the others aren’t letting the smoke impede their activities, but I am walking around sounding like I have C.O.P.D. For those not aware of the acronym, it is Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease – nothing you ever want.
I arrived in British Columbia with the last stages of a chest cold still clinging on. It should be over by now, but my chest is tight and I am continually apologizing for my terrible hacking cough, so I figure perhaps the smoke is contributing to my discomfort (and by association, the discomfort of everyone around me).
Stephanie, Brendan & Tyler spent Wednesday, Day Four of my visit in beautiful Banff, Alberta. We did the tourist things – shopped until we dropped, enjoyed yummy lunch at the Magpie & Stump, an authentic Mexican restaurant. Then off to the Fairmont Banff Springs Hotel. Boy, more than a century ago the CPR (Canadian Pacific Railway) sure knew how to build incredible hotels for weary travellers crossing this beautiful country via train.
Stephanie, Brendan & the marble Bear
Day five, we stayed around home in Golden BC. Bren and Ty accomplished a few necessities prior to heading back to university next week. I amused myself with my book, my laptop, a wee walk around the property.
Below – Stephanie’s impressive garden
Steph worked from home, then cooked up some culinary delights.
Ingredients – olive oil, lemon juice, kale, spinach, basil, garlic cloves, S&P. Yum!
Before dinner, we headed for a walk along the Kicking Horse River. Simple pleasures remain the most memorable somehow.
The boys and Steph skipped rocks across the river while I searched for river rocks that appealed to me. Of course I will lug them back to Ontario.
Below – Steph, Bren & Tyler searching for good skipping rocks, Kicking Horse
River, Golden, British Columbia
Last year I brought home stones to make an Inuksuk – a memory of the large one the boys and I made for Steph so she would remember that “we too passed this way”. My small rocks are still on a shelf in the garage.
Dinner was a scrumptious taco salad …
Good night all. I am off to bed to get rested for grizzly bears and mountain top adventures.
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SMOKE 2 … BC Travels 2015 – Days 2&3 . Memoir .
The smoke is even thicker today as it wafts on the wind, northward from Washington State, its pungent odour unmistakable. I can’t even imagine what it must be like to live within a few hundred miles of a forest fire, but the photo below of the fire raging south of us in B.C.’s Okanogan area on August 20, 2015, give a terrifying glimpse …
Last week Firefighters in British Columbia’s Okanogan Valley, faced with an enormous challenge.
Yesterday, day 2 of my visit was quiet for us in Golden, British Columbia.
The food has been grand. My grandson, Brendan has become our breakfast chef.
Today our outting was a daytrip northwest to scout out the town of Revelstoke. The drive was filled with firsts for me:
First avalanche tunnels (through Roger’s Pass).
Below – View inside tunnel
My First Avalanche (road crews were working on it, causing traffic stoppage).
First time in Revelstoke, B.C. – whoop whoop.
My First Glaciers … and smoke from forest fires continues to decorate each image as if taken through a filtered lens.
We returned home in time to greet Jeff’s son Cael, Cael’s partner Haley, her Mom & brother. We enjoyed dinner and a fun evening together
That is it for Monday and Tuesday.
inknpetals 